21 Tweets About Quitting Smoking That Are Hilarious And Real AF


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I’ll quit tomorrow or next month or maybe next year.

1.

Them: “Its a new year I’m gonna quit smoking
& eat healthier” me:

— Red Eye Tribe™ (@RedEyeTribe)

ID: 10255505

2.

Just because I quit smoking doesn’t mean I
gave up getting up and randomly leaving the
room for 10 minutes.

— J. Elvis Weinstein (@JElvisWeinstein)

ID: 10255582

4.

[2021] One smoker left in the world. The Quit
Smoking ads get personal. HEY KEVIN, STOP
SMOKING. YOU STINK. YOUR WIFE SAYS YOU NEED
VIAGRA.

— Hoppers (@FrogAvalanche)

ID: 10255547

5.

I can help anyone quit smoking by spraying
them with hair spray as they light their
cigarette.

— PieGuy (@ilovepie84)

ID: 10255630

7.

New Year resolution was to quit smoking. I
never said for how long. Lasted an entire 34
minutes. It was horrible.

— sahara (@skitzoette)

ID: 10255509

8.

DOCTOR: If you don’t quit smoking you won’t
need to save money for retirement ME: You’re
the best doctor ever

— 1 (@ericsshadow)

ID: 10255567

9.

Cigarettes only give you cancer if you let
them. It’s called science. Maybe you’d know
more about it if you read as many Yahoo
Answers as me

— noog (@noog)

ID: 10256284

10.

[takes e-cig from guy beside me & takes a
hit] dude, your e-cig is broken GUY BESIDE
ME: give me back my clarinet

— Blind Chow (@BlindChow)

ID: 10256525

12.

“Quit smoking with Chantix, you may suffer
seizures and suicidal thoughts while taking
Chantix” Lol brah, I’ll just keep smoking

— Bandit (@bates_weston)

ID: 10255517

13.

[1st day at work] BOSS: Erm..we..have No
Smoking rules here ME: That’s great Alan
[blows out smoke] most places have loads of
smoking rules

— Jon (@ArfMeasures)

ID: 10256516

14.

My doctor told me, “If you don’t quit
smoking, it doesn’t really matter how poorly
you eat” and that was the best day of my
life.

— 1 (@ericsshadow)

ID: 10256465

15.

I like my women like I like my cigarettes,
slowly killing me in packs of 20 or more

— DODIX (@D8DIX)

ID: 10256299

16.

So I decided to quit smoking, so I can live
longer for my dog🙃❤

— Lexie Nikole (@Lexie_Nikole)

ID: 10255510

18.

Attempting to quit smoking has given me a
whole new outlook on life, like murder or
severe maiming no longer seems so
unreasonable

— Matthew (@thema7721)

ID: 10255534

20.

Last night,I fell asleep with one of those
new e-cigarettes in my mouth. I woke up half
an hour later and my whole house was on the
internet

— Bob Kostic (@causticbob)

ID: 10256276

21.

I typed “Cigarettes” in the search bar and it
said “No Matches”. The universe has spoken.

— #Bernie2020 (@Datoism)

ID: 10256454

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Maggy Van Eijk is the UK social media editor for
BuzzFeed and is based in London.

 

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