35 Secrets Midwives Will Never Give Away


Google is your worst enemy when you’re pregnant.

This is every midwife’s most powerful weapon.

This is every midwife's most powerful weapon.

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No matter how chaotic a midwife’s schedule is, her bag is ALWAYS neatly packed.

No matter how chaotic a midwife's schedule is, her bag is ALWAYS neatly packed.

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Anytime someone mentions a “pool,” this is the first thing a midwife thinks of:

Anytime someone mentions a "pool," this is the first thing a midwife thinks of:

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Midwives are teachers, and this is what their classroom looks like:

Midwives are teachers, and this is what their classroom looks like:

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Midwives are jacked, because this is the arm workout they do every day.

Instagram: @hebammesissirasche

Midwives are capable of stitching together ruptures as well as any surgeon–even near the most sensitive part of a woman’s body.

Midwives are capable of stitching together ruptures as well as any surgeon–even near the most sensitive part of a woman's body.

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The stamps they keep on hand are a little different from something an office worker might use.

The stamps they keep on hand are a little different from something an office worker might use.

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A midwife’s planner isn’t square, it’s round.

A midwife's planner isn't square, it's round.

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Never tell a midwife that their only responsibility is to hold hands and light a few candles during delivery.

Never tell a midwife that their only responsibility is to hold hands and light a few candles during delivery.

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Midwives go through extensive training.

Instagram: @itswiebke

And they’re great listeners.

Instagram: @fraeulein_lavendel

This is what midwives use to talk with their clients. (The babies, not the mothers.)

This is what midwives use to talk with their clients. (The babies, not the mothers.)

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Midwives know how powerful mothers become while delivering, and often go home covered in bruises.

Midwives know how powerful mothers become while delivering, and often go home covered in bruises.

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There are no normal business hours when you’re a midwife.

There are no normal business hours when you're a midwife.

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The job can be stressful, so they need to find some cheerfulness where they can with their work.

The job can be stressful, so they need to find some cheerfulness where they can with their work.

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Wellness means something different to midwives than to other people

Instagram: @mademoiselle_jh

They spend a lot of time reading picture books.

They spend a lot of time reading picture books.

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And playing with dolls.

And playing with dolls.

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Sometimes very terrifying dolls.

Sometimes very terrifying dolls.

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Every midwife forms a special and deep attachment to their practice dolls during training.

Instagram: @thetravelling_midwife

Midwives can answer any question you could possibly have about feeding your children.

Instagram: @krissi_v177

They’re also essentially personal trainers, and can help you work out muscles you didn’t even know you had.

Instagram: @wasfuermich

Midwives are more valuable than Google.

Midwives are more valuable than Google.

babycentre.co.uk

They can size up your entire pregnancy with just a single glance at complex charts like this one:

They can size up your entire pregnancy with just a single glance at complex charts like this one:

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Nothing is taboo for a midwife.

Instagram: @lchaimoils

And nobody is more eager and hopeful than a midwife student and the beginning of their training.

Instagram: @heliosklinikumberlinbuch

And don’t forget about the male midwives! (And yes! They’re still called midwives!)

Instagram: @heb

Even the longest, most exhausting overnight shift is made more bearable if your favorite colleague is there to assist.

Instagram: @hanni1401

Midwives will not hesitate to throw anyone out of a delivery room at any moment for any reason.

Instagram: @magicaldays

They can never get enough tiny, shriveled baby feet.

They can never get enough tiny, shriveled baby feet.

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And they are constantly amazed by small wonders.

Instagram: @hanni1401

Midwives see mothers and their loved ones at their strongest, weakest, most vulnerable, and at their happiest.

Instagram: @janinamaurerbilddesign

A midwife is the strongest shoulder you can lean on.

Instagram: @getragensein

And it’s never just a job. It’s a calling.

Instagram: @josephine_neubert_fotografie

But the best reward a midwife can get is a heartfelt thanks from the mother she helped.

Instagram: @yogi_midwife

This post was translated from German.



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