39 Fascinating Things People Actually Do When They’re Alone


Health

And you thought you were the only one who plucked your pubic
hair.

Posted on April 24, 2017, 18:51 GMT

We
asked members of the
BuzzFeed Community to share the weirdest things they
secretly do when they’re home alone. Here were just some of
their answers.

1. “As president of the Itty Bitty
Titty Committee, I find fun in layering push-up bras.”

“I contour what cleavage I have, stuff socks in my bra, the
whole shebang. I could never actually wear this out in the
world (I’d be too embarrassed and I have conservative
parents) but it’s nice to dream.”

—16/Female

2. “I’ll pretend that I’m talking to
Barbara Walters or am on The Today Show.”

“I do ‘interviews.’ I’ll take on roles like I’m being
interviewed as a newly appointed Supreme Court judge or a
lifestyle guru or bestselling author. I just talk through and
respond to questions. It’s my favorite way to get chores done
and is actually pretty helpful for actual job interviews
because I’m constantly practicing casually and gracefully
giving answers.”

—23/Unspecified

3.

Paperkites / Getty Images / Via Anna Borges / BuzzFeed

4. “Turns out, your body won’t really
let you crap yourself.”

“I once bought a diaper from CVS because I wanted to know
what it felt like to shit myself before I was old. Went home
and sat in my room for hours in a diaper. Turns out, your
body won’t really let you crap yourself, so I drank three
gallons of water so I could at least pee so it wouldn’t be a
complete failure.”

—24/Unspecified

5. “I sometimes walk around wearing my
shirt as a skirt and my pants on my arms.”

“Along with this, I also wear socks as mittens and mittens as
socks. Just because it’s weird and sometimes I feel like
doing weird things.”

—30/Female

6. “I like to let my pubes grow really
long, and I like to stroke them when I’m alone.”

“While I’m stroking my pubic hair, I place the hairs in
between my fingers, then pull hard on them and take my hand
out of my underwear. Usually, a few hairs will come out and I
like to place them onto a napkin, tissue, or table near me so
I can look at them later.”

—21/Female

7.

aluxum / Getty Images / Via Anna Borges / BuzzFeed
News

8. “When I’m alone, I sit on my bed and
pretend to record YouTube videos.”

“I’ve never gotten around to creating my channel. I really go
in-depth with my videos. I’ll do Q&As, Get Ready With Me,
and Storytimes. Maybe my dreams will come true one day.”

—18/Female

9. “When I’m home alone I sometimes put
a pillow up my shirt and pretend I’m pregnant.”

“I don’t do anything strange I just go about whatever else I
was doing whether it be doing dishes, school work, or just
sitting around.”

—23/Female

11. “I sit on my bed, facing the
balcony, and I watch the people walking outside.”

“Normally I try to imagine what kind of things they’re
experiencing in their lives and what methods they use to
overcome their struggles. It’s my odd way of dealing with
depression and finding a solution to get myself motivated.”

—28/Female

12. “When I’m alone, I like to just talk
in random accents to no one in particular.”

“My favorite is the Australian accent, even though I’m
completely terrible at it.”

—18/Female

13.

drante / Getty Images / Via Anna Borges / BuzzFeed
News

14. “It’s only when I am alone that I
can finally feel free.”

“I breathe. And sing. And dance. And talk to myself. I feel
free. Whenever my family is around, my lungs feel like they
are a supernova, collapsing into themselves. It’s only when I
am alone, never lonely, that I can finally feel free. So the
weirdest thing I do is breathing. It’s feeling free.”

—20/Female

15. “I recite sayings or carve sigils
into things in my room or write them on post-its or on
myself.”

“Witchcraft. I recite sayings or carve sigils into things in
my room or write them on post-its or on myself. They’re
spells for good luck on tests and being safe walking home on
campus and that kind of stuff. Nobody knows because they’d
think I’m crazy but it really works.”

—18/Female

16.

NBC / Via Anna Borges / BuzzFeed News

17. “I put on full on concerts in my
room when my roommate is gone. Like FULL ON.”

“I will dress up and dance and sing and address the crowd
with anecdotes on ‘what this next song means to me.’ Really
embarrassing when my roommate comes home early and hears me
shout, ‘HOW Y’ALL FEELIN’ TONIGHT, CHICAGO?'”

—25/Unspecified

18. “I compare my cats head to the size
of fruits and I honestly don’t think it’s that weird.”

“There might be something wrong with my cat because she’s
huge but a mango is smaller than her head. Is that weird?”

—20/Unspecified

19.

Paday / Getty Images / Via Anna Borges / BuzzFeed News

20. “When I’m alone, I like to go to my
roommate’s room.”

“She has a collection of baseball cards, which are stacked in
perfect mounds. I like to grab a handful and stick it under
her pillow. When she finds them she gets really mad at me,
and I have to make her dinner. I like hiding and screwing
with people’s stuff for some reason.”

—23/Female

21. “Sometimes I have to swindle my cat
out of a million dollars to keep her from taking over the
world.”

“I run around the house pretending to be a spy. Shooting an
invisible gun and ducking behind walls to avoid invisible
bullets. Performing acts of espionage. Sometimes I have to
swindle my cat out of a million dollars to keep her from
taking over the world. I lead a ~very~ exciting life.”

—17/Female

22.

Arttanja / Getty Images / Via Anna Borges / BuzzFeed

23. “I lay on the floor and pretend I’m
a dying worm.”

“Like, almost every time I’m alone. If it’s not too hot, I
get inside a sleeping bag and THEN pretend I’m a dying worm.
I also like making random whale noises.”

—Unspecified/Female

24. “I read out loud when I’m alone.
It’s kind of an attempt at voice acting and at proofreading
my writing.”

“Sometimes I even record myself doing it like I’m doing an
audiobook and listen to it back. I hate the sound of my own
voice, I think I sound like a child, and this is my way of
getting over that.”

—19/Female

25.

GeorgeDolgikh / Getty Images / Via Anna Borges / BuzzFeed
News

26. “I like to put on some really chill
and nice music and do a naked photo shoot of myself.”

“First off, I’m a photographer so I have a few pieces of
fairly expensive equipment. So, when I’m alone I like to put
on some really chill and nice music and do a naked photo
shoot of myself. I pose in all different positions and
photograph all different angles, and it just makes me feel
really pretty and confident.”

—22/Female

27. “Just last week I was screaming
‘FUCK’ over and over for thirty minutes.”

“When I’m alone, I like to cuss randomly. Just last week I
was screaming ‘FUCK’ over and over for thirty minutes.
Honestly it’s a big stress reliever and a good way for me to
get my anger out.”

—18/Female

28.

Coprid / Getty Images / Via Anna Borges / BuzzFeed
News

29. “When I’m home alone I really like
to walk on my hands and knees.”

“It started out as a way to stretch my back, but I’ve found
it to be so fun that I can’t wait for everyone to leave
sometimes.”

—24/Female

30. “I love singing and acting out
scenes from my favorite musicals.”

“Not just humming, but full-on belting and acting. Music and
singing have always been an escape and a way to express
myself, so after a long day the perfect way to end it is with
a strong pick-me-up musical theatre number.”

—16/Female

31.

Anna Borges / BuzzFeed News

32. “I swoop around with a blanket
around my shoulders, like it’s a billowing cloak.”

“I could be a witch, an old time-y detective, or a king in
luxurious clothes. Grand entrances are made and I am a
fabulous person.”

—16/Agender

33. “I like to pretend to have long,
involved arguments.”

“Not just with people who I’ve been with during the day. No,
these are completely made up situations with me muttering
away and gesturing. I find it helps to keep me sane while
working retail.”

—38/Female

34.

fad1986 / Getty Images / Twisted Pictures / Via Anna Borges /
BuzzFeed News

35. “My typical day of being alone
consists of a shower in which I insert a butt plug that stays
in for the remainder of my alone time.”

“Then I continue to do the following in nothing but my
dinosaur or unicorn underwear: singing 80s music at the top
of my lungs while making eggless cookie dough, then eating it
while either playing video games or watching porn.”

—18/Female

36. “I play out my favorite characters
doing awesome stuff.”

“I have a pretty rich imagination and when I’m alone, I have
a Spotify playlist full of epic music that I like to crank up
while I play out my favorite characters doing awesome stuff
in my mind. My go-to has always been Harry Potter going on
Auror-related adventures, but lately I’ve been imagining
Daenerys finally arriving in Westeros. There’s a lot of
jumping around the room involved and some play-acting.
Sounds​ weird, but it gets the heart pumping and makes me
happy.”

—Unspecified/Female

37.

TheCrimsonMonkey / Getty Images / Via Anna Borges / BuzzFeed
News

38. “I made my own MASH-style game that
I take pretty seriously.”

“I write a list of the people that I ‘date’ along with the
dates of the relationship, and I keep track of any ‘children’
that I have with them. I go through three or four notebooks a
month because of it. I have an Excel sheet with a massive
list of celebrity crushes that I pick from until the sheet is
empty, at which point I print off a new one and start over. I
have pretty bad anxiety, and I find it helps me stay
grounded, and helps my brain from wandering to things it
shouldn’t be focusing on.”

—26/Female

39. “I have an imaginary
boyfriend.”

“In bed at night, I go to what is essentially a fantasy world
in my mind and spend time with him.”

—28/Female

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